Make people happy

If earth is just a small dot in universe that Allah has created beautifully for us,

it means that, the world I have seen, places I have been,

it's not even 1% of the universe. MasyaAllah

and I was thinking of what have I done for twenty three years of living.

I have hurt many hearts,

I have been a very bad daughter to my parents,

a very unreliable sister to my siblings,

a very selfish person to my friends,

a very rude students to my teachers,

and a pain in my team.

so imagine, if I can travel to all over that small dot,

how much damage I will cause,

how many hearts I will harm?

and, even so

Allah still sending beautiful souls to me,

to accompany me

along my roughest way

and what did I ever do to receive their kindness in return?

what did I ever do that Allah reward me with those kind of people in my life

and I know,

only by saying that I am grateful is not enough,

only by assuring myself by saying that I will love them is not enough,

I must act upon my words,

hence, I am trying my very best

to not be someone's else pain.

and

for making people happy,

I hope, my children would not experience my pain.

I hope, there will always good people besides them.

because I know, 

no matter how much I wanted to protect them,

there will be the day, I'll need to leave them.

p/s: Dear my future children, please know this, mummy has missed you, long before you are born.